Hello, pancake.

KRAFTWERK - COMPUTERLIEBE / COMPUTERLOVE

Frustration? Bad luck? Tears? Discontentment? Been there, done that.
Though been there a bit too much if you want my opinion (though I'm sure you don't).
Yes, it gives strength in life and makes you independent and all that crap, but I could have done without it, to be honest ^^

Anyway, how to get through it? "Relativise", and I don't mean Albert Einstein here, I mean rather thinking outside of your box. You're in a shit situation, think about all the other people in a shit situation, and far worse than yours and make a list of all the advantages you have (e.g: financially, mentally, physically...) and in that way to me anyone can be happy, but that's only due to the fact we all have different expectations really. So yeah, it's nothing too objective, but it helps you get through. Well it helps me anyway, and that's all I need...

As for the rest I do my best. I try to care about others and be there for them, as much as I physically/mentally can - I'm not always successful, I know.
Anyway, due to the several events this week I've come to the conclusion that I should be more detached and self-centred. Sounds quite gloomy doesn't it? But it'd probably work, being a New Romantic doesn't seem that appealing to me anymore. And prince charming is not a sword fighter on his horse killing a villain to free you, prince charming is a guy taking some pills and drinking absinthe to have the guts to text you the morning after (yes, that's the new way to fight against our inner demons). *sigh* What can I say? I know the future is bright, but I can't see the light. The tunnel is really long, and it seems like I've run out of fuel and am not going on anymore... The only things I can really cling to I seem to be losing grip of, it's insane. Nothing's tangible, nothing's real, and if this is a dream the awakening doesn't seem to be an option...
Don't worry, I'm nothing close to depressed, just... facing life's nature, finally... took its time, and it's taking its toll too. And it feels terrible to sit and stare at the cracking ceiling like a captain abandoning its boat, and being impotent, powerless... All those words of encouragment that I took for granted are now fickle, forlorn, derelict... somewhere far and lost in my mind, like a treasure, but I've no map. And even if I had the map I don't have the key. The key is love. Be my goldsmith and give me access to that gift that happiness is. Don't let the chest sink darker into the gloomy, cold, uncovered ocean that my heart is... Warm it up.

I have no clue what that was. Inspiration I guess. Now about whether or not it makes sense you tell me... all I know is I'm using my telescope and trying to see as far as possible, in the distance... and it should be just there, we're almost ashore, oh dear promised land, oh dear love of mine...


Now get out of my head and off my mind people and go listen to a bit of Dodos to soothe you, Le Corps Mince de Françoise to party (N.B.: BIG UP to LOTP, Metronomy ... (aka, Myetronomïyé), Smiths, Talking Heads, etc...), and watch Patrick Wolf's amazinggggggggg new video (despite the Hunting for Witches soundalike (yay, let's invent words!) intro) to enlighten your life.

And a bonus :B

ps: Keep an eye on NylonMagazineTV's YouTube channel, they interview several of Pukkelpop's acts that I really like, or just bands I really like overall.

Good night kids! (I'll try to sleep now)
xxx

Future Plaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaans.

Ah, Summer. *Sigh*

It came like the breeze and put our minds at ease. But we already knew that,
"Summer is coming and I hope I feel better by the time it does,
Then I could leave my room my cocoon find the door and walk out to the sun.
Feel like I’ve moved on, lessons learnt my mind is feeling calm and so reassured
Yeah things are on the up, I’m on top of the situation I’ve endured " dixit Miss Hatherley.

Well, now we need plans - what to do? That is the big question - so here's the answer, for me anyway.

Music surge: Lotttttttts and lots of new stuff to listen to or buy or order, or pre-order.
#1: Humbug by Arctic Monkeys - I feel like saying "Never judge an album by its title", which would make sense because I'd never have bought any AM album otherwise. But fact is I've been waiting for this for two years, so we'll have to restart the process, namely;
Rush to FNAC asap, go to the Music department, grab the album (which entails pupil dilation, heart rate speeding and all that), paying, running down the escalators off to the metro, rushing home, locking my door, closing my curtains, lying on my bed, closing my eyes, and opening my ears (and chakras) and sheding a tear by the last track. Then restarting the process a good 2/3 times before liking it. Anyway, Fire and the Thud appears to be on the tracklisting which was surprising as I've had it for a year or so (acoustic version): Fire and the Thud

#2: Manners by Passion Pit (am looking forward to hearing that one)

#3: Grace/Wastelands by Peter Doherty (should be interesting)

Other than that I don't know really, can't remember my memory is letting me down these days.

As for the rest, I will and shall hate anyone going to Dour during the whole 4 days, but I should be attending Pukkelpop anyway (i.e.: Arctic Monkeys, Passion Pit, Simian Mobile Disco, Kraftwerk, La Roux, Maxïmo Park, Vampire Weekend, Dizzee Rascal, Klaxons (!!!), Kap Bambino, The Maccabees, The Virgins, Dananananaykroyd, Black Lips, Blood Red Shoes, MSTRKRFT, Bombay Bicycle Club, etc...)

So yeah, that's as bright as life gets for me these days. Music. I live off music. A bit like a hobo lives off [G]garbage, though I know many of you wouldn't mind living off Shirley Manson ^^
But yeah. That's it for now...

Merry Summermas my children!

...Suite [CHAPTER II?]

"Hi. I...I'm sorry I have to go, I shouldn't be here." she said. But blood was dripping from her chin where her guitar had just hit her, and the boy noticed.
"Are you sure? If I were you I'd get something done about my chin first"
Before she had the time to understand she saw a droplet of blood on her pristine guitar.
"Come here, I live just across the park, I have a first aid kit I'll help you out, I owe you that after all!" she hesitated but could start feeling the blood covering her chin now.
"Wait here, I'll be right back" he said and went to see his friends and took something.
When he came back, Jamie had a green bag across his chest and a grin on his face.
"I live just there, in the white house" he said, and they walked in silence with her holding her tissue on her chin still painful.
He brought his bag to the front to look for his keys and opened the door.

As she entered the house, there was a warm welcoming familiar smell of cake and family portraits scattered on the four walls. She paid attention to one in particular in which she thought she could recognise a picture of Jamie when he was younger. His parents, she thought, looked young and cheerful and his sister looked just like him - possibly she was his twin. As she was observing everything closely she didn't hear Jamie coming downstairs but apparently he had been looking at her too, her and her dark curly hair and pink cheekbones. Her, and her slight chubbiness but also her undeniable charm, nevertheless - and he liked that.

"Hey, erm..." he was about to say her name when he realized he didn't know it. "Wait. What's your name? I've brought you the first aid kit, there's tape and all in it, and I got my lifeguard license last summer, so don't worry, I can fix this!" She was puzzled by this whole situation, she wasn't meant to be there. But she figured out from his endeavour that he was a caring person, and also from his lifeguard experience he was probably quite muscled... But as she was thinking that she felt the weigh of his eyes on her and felt that she had to say something.
"Oh, right, thank you" she said, as he got close to her to put the band aid on, he was close enough for her to feel his warm breath on her mouth and his smell. "Lynx Africa", she thought.
When he put the disinfectant on her chin it hurt and she uttered a small "Owwwch", which made him feel uncomfortable. "I'm so sorry!" he said and he got up brutally, knocking his head against a lamp behind him as he also uttered his pain. They were both standing there looking quite silly though in pain as his mobile rang. He picked it up and had a quick chat "...Sure, what time?" "...Great! Alright then, I miss you too, see you" "...Yes, me too"

Who was it? she wondered and assumed it was his girlfriend; fair enough after all. When he finished his phone call he came back close to her, put a bit more disinfectant but it didn't hurt her this time, then he put a small round band aid on her chin and said "Voilà!" with an almost perfect accent. "Thank you", she said then after the pause she said "I'm Rebecca" to which he answered
"Well, it's definitely nice to meet you Rebecca, I'm sorry about the unfortunate circumstances though, but yeah, this is where I live! My name's Jamie Smith, I'm 18 and not quite sure what I want to do in life" he smiled and she felt compelled to answer "Well. I'm Rebecca Tate*, 17 and I want to be someone good"

For a moment he looked confused and looked as if about to ask something very meaningful but just asked her "Would you fancy a drink, Rebecca?" "Sure" she said "That'd be really nice" she answered "Okay, do you want something cold or hot? Actually, it's near 4 - tea time, so I propose some cinnamon tea and some cupcakes... if you want? I think we've got a few cupcakes left" Her jaws must have dropped because as she answered "Erm, it's really nice but I don't really do tea time..." he burst out laughing and simply said "Okay, let's go have a drink somewhere so you can tell me more about yourself then" she couldn't refuse. As he went up to get his jacket she took her mobile phone out and sent the words "I found him", and as he came back with his army jacket she just smiled at him and they left the house whilst talking about sunshine and lollipops. On their way she received a text saying "You weren't meant to go there" and told herself "Too late"


* Hahahaha - well what, how am I meant to entertain myself on a Sunday night, huh?

"Write me a story, I want to read a love story" she said

She wasn't meant to be there.
She had just decided to go for a walk to get away from all the bad vibrations around her.
She took her guitar with her, with no strap and just went for a walk.

She strolled the streets of her neighbourhood and just found herself in her favourite place on earth.

In the park, she found an empty bench, in a world, she thought, that was empty too; unlike her head who was full of thoughts and melancholy.

She was reminiscing her life as a little girl when she spent her Sunday afternoons watching cartoons whilst eating grapes, dressing up or going to pool parties with her friends or playing hide and seek.

But now, she didn't do any of those things any more.
Her weekends consisted of going out to places where she didn't even want to go with people she didn't even care about.
Now her life was bleak and incomplete.

She was singing what was on her heart when a football ball steadily came in her direction and landed a few centimetres next to her though it should have landed on her head, but in the process of avoiding the ball, she knocked her head against her guitar.

Then, as she looked up, angry and ready to shout at the person who had interrupted her meditation, she saw a tall young man with dark hair standing in front of her. He spoke first.

"I'm so so sorry!" he said, and she was about to answer but was too baffled to utter a word and all that came out was "Erm...".
But the boy didn't look like he was about to give up and he continued.
"I'm sorry, I told my friends to be careful, I didn't even want to play ! I mean, I heard someone singing and then I saw you so I told them, 'Hey guys, be careful', but they didn't listen and then they...- Sorry. I'm Jamie, nice to meet you, what's your name?"

And finally she felt confident and managed to answer:
"Hi. I'm...

[Story to be continued when I have more time and if there's any demand :P]